Taking a page from Shmoopie...I'm taking my grandmother to the pension office on Friday. I cannot wait. I'm so excited I could puke. And why am I taking her there? That's right, so she can do her cute, shaky left handed signature. Once that's done, we'll get the usual blank look from the clerk and that will be our sign to go the fuck home.
Pray for my stupid soul.
*sigh*
Wednesday, October 29, 2003
Tuesday, October 28, 2003
This one's for Kirk
if you love her (would you buy her a gun?)
I see her walking home
I see her casting shadows on the street
A car pulls up behind her
Rolls down the window, he starts to speak
And there's a target on her
and there's a bullet with her number
and she's an unarmed soldier now
but not for long
'cause it's a war and if you care, if you love her, buy her a gun
'cause it's a war
and she's a soldier, if you care, if you love her, buy her a gun
I see her walking home
I see him rolling softly at her heels
Headlights silhouette her
His heart beats faster as he grips the wheel
She looks for lighted doorways
He thinks that she could be the one
Laughing softly to himself
Could she make it if she runs?
And there's a target on her
and there's a bullet with her number
and she's an unarmed soldier
She's an unarmed soldier now
But not for long
'cause it's a war and if you care, if you love her, buy her a gun
'cause it's a war, and she's a soldier, If you care, if you love her, buy her a gun
If you love her, buy her a gun
Your girlfriend, your sister, your daughter, your mum
If you love her, buy her a gun
so she can blow some bastard's head off if he follows her home
Do you love her? Would you buy her a gun?
Do you love her? Would you buy her a gun?
Do you love her? Would you buy her a gun?
Do you love her? Would you buy her a gun?
if you love her (would you buy her a gun?)
I see her walking home
I see her casting shadows on the street
A car pulls up behind her
Rolls down the window, he starts to speak
And there's a target on her
and there's a bullet with her number
and she's an unarmed soldier now
but not for long
'cause it's a war and if you care, if you love her, buy her a gun
'cause it's a war
and she's a soldier, if you care, if you love her, buy her a gun
I see her walking home
I see him rolling softly at her heels
Headlights silhouette her
His heart beats faster as he grips the wheel
She looks for lighted doorways
He thinks that she could be the one
Laughing softly to himself
Could she make it if she runs?
And there's a target on her
and there's a bullet with her number
and she's an unarmed soldier
She's an unarmed soldier now
But not for long
'cause it's a war and if you care, if you love her, buy her a gun
'cause it's a war, and she's a soldier, If you care, if you love her, buy her a gun
If you love her, buy her a gun
Your girlfriend, your sister, your daughter, your mum
If you love her, buy her a gun
so she can blow some bastard's head off if he follows her home
Do you love her? Would you buy her a gun?
Do you love her? Would you buy her a gun?
Do you love her? Would you buy her a gun?
Do you love her? Would you buy her a gun?
Monday, October 27, 2003
Scary thought of the morning:
I'm fuckin' happy!
Yeah, it's been awhile since I've been school girl on fire giddy. I'm even being nice to the minions. That could be a sign of the upcoming apocalypse, y'know.
My hair is still fire engine red, I'm still thinking about embracing a healthy lifestyle & I see a trip to the gym in my near future. How crazy is that?!?!?!
The rowing season is winding down so I'm starting to gear up to do some major working out. The goal is to lose 5 more pounds so I can replace it all with muscle. Worked a few years ago, so we'll see if I can pull it off this year. Just gotta give up on the Heineken.
Come to think of it, maybe this working out thing is horribly overrated.
I'm fuckin' happy!
Yeah, it's been awhile since I've been school girl on fire giddy. I'm even being nice to the minions. That could be a sign of the upcoming apocalypse, y'know.
My hair is still fire engine red, I'm still thinking about embracing a healthy lifestyle & I see a trip to the gym in my near future. How crazy is that?!?!?!
The rowing season is winding down so I'm starting to gear up to do some major working out. The goal is to lose 5 more pounds so I can replace it all with muscle. Worked a few years ago, so we'll see if I can pull it off this year. Just gotta give up on the Heineken.
Come to think of it, maybe this working out thing is horribly overrated.
Sunday, October 26, 2003
How you know you've got a keeper...you do some drunk dialing and you're greeted with "Baby, I thought you'd call later. It's only 10.30, you're a fucking pussy".
Yes, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I am officially smitten. Dammit.
That and I think my blog is possessed.
Shit keeps appearing that I know I didn't type/think/wish. Dammit. Perhaps it's time to change locales. Hrm. Too drunk to seriously consider that now.
Gonna go finish my cup of tea and chill out to some old Bowie tunes. Aww yeah.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I am officially smitten. Dammit.
That and I think my blog is possessed.
Shit keeps appearing that I know I didn't type/think/wish. Dammit. Perhaps it's time to change locales. Hrm. Too drunk to seriously consider that now.
Gonna go finish my cup of tea and chill out to some old Bowie tunes. Aww yeah.
Friday, October 24, 2003
Argh. I'm still reviewing documents.
My attention span is shorter than that of a school girl on fire.
Dammit.
Shmoopie, you didn't miss much with the snowing thing. Except for me freaking out about it.
And saying "fuck" a lot. In the office.
I'm so hard core.
I blame my hair.
A sign that the big guy isn't happy with the Jesus flick:
Dude.
Mel take the hint. Your freaking assistant director got hit TWICE!
But I still couldn't help but giggle at the whole thing. I am such a bad Catholic.
*sigh*
My attention span is shorter than that of a school girl on fire.
Dammit.
Shmoopie, you didn't miss much with the snowing thing. Except for me freaking out about it.
And saying "fuck" a lot. In the office.
I'm so hard core.
I blame my hair.
A sign that the big guy isn't happy with the Jesus flick:
Dude.
Mel take the hint. Your freaking assistant director got hit TWICE!
But I still couldn't help but giggle at the whole thing. I am such a bad Catholic.
*sigh*
Thursday, October 23, 2003
Best of Both Worlds
Hoo boy.
Weasel Central is still buzzing. Rumour has it that there are more layoffs around the corner. Some of us are nervous. Some of us are praying that we're next. Some of us are beyond caring.
The affair (for lack of a better word, once again) with part of W.C's management team is off and running like a freight train. We'll see what happens in the long run.
All I have do is remember to breathe.
[edited: yesh, I'm a big wussy and I had to get rid of the "girlfriend" reference. It was freaking me the fuck out.]
Hoo boy.
Weasel Central is still buzzing. Rumour has it that there are more layoffs around the corner. Some of us are nervous. Some of us are praying that we're next. Some of us are beyond caring.
The affair (for lack of a better word, once again) with part of W.C's management team is off and running like a freight train. We'll see what happens in the long run.
All I have do is remember to breathe.
[edited: yesh, I'm a big wussy and I had to get rid of the "girlfriend" reference. It was freaking me the fuck out.]
Wednesday, October 22, 2003
Weasel Central is in an uproar. Downsizing has run rampant through the building, and once again, fuckin' ignored me. But got all the good ones. *sigh*
There's a weird energy around here. Like no one believes that the worst of it all is over yet. They've done a two day "blitz" (for lack of a better word) and well, we're wondering if they'll extend it by a day or two. I'm not sure. A lot of people are being walked out of the building. It's crazy. Like cows to the slaughter is the image that keeps popping into my head.
I don't feel like being here. But that could very well be the Gravol haze that I'm just getting out of.
Man, I don't think I can do this job anymore.
I think the job search is going to go into overdrive.
I need to save what's left of my sanity.
And I need to do it fast.
There's a weird energy around here. Like no one believes that the worst of it all is over yet. They've done a two day "blitz" (for lack of a better word) and well, we're wondering if they'll extend it by a day or two. I'm not sure. A lot of people are being walked out of the building. It's crazy. Like cows to the slaughter is the image that keeps popping into my head.
I don't feel like being here. But that could very well be the Gravol haze that I'm just getting out of.
Man, I don't think I can do this job anymore.
I think the job search is going to go into overdrive.
I need to save what's left of my sanity.
And I need to do it fast.
Monday, October 20, 2003
Dish? You effin' wish
This whole Weasel Central sneaking around thing is great. Except we're already acting like giddy school girls around each other. And doing marathon phone calls in the evenings. Yes, it's official...We're lame.
Details? A marathon make out session on the sofa. I learned one thing from that...I am too freakin' old to be making out on my sofa! I feel like I'm 96 or something.
Yeah, so far so great.
Further details of my scandalous evening will not be posted. Cause really, that's all there is. But if you insist on more, email me. I can't be airing all of my dirty laundry on the phucking web, now can I?
In other news, I am now a flaming red head. Gotta love a hair dye that's called "Red Corvette". How sweet is that?!?!?!
This whole Weasel Central sneaking around thing is great. Except we're already acting like giddy school girls around each other. And doing marathon phone calls in the evenings. Yes, it's official...We're lame.
Details? A marathon make out session on the sofa. I learned one thing from that...I am too freakin' old to be making out on my sofa! I feel like I'm 96 or something.
Yeah, so far so great.
Further details of my scandalous evening will not be posted. Cause really, that's all there is. But if you insist on more, email me. I can't be airing all of my dirty laundry on the phucking web, now can I?
In other news, I am now a flaming red head. Gotta love a hair dye that's called "Red Corvette". How sweet is that?!?!?!
Sunday, October 19, 2003
I was going to post one of my usual David Lynch like posts (what is UP with that lately?!?!?), but I decided against it. Maybe cause I'm tired. Very tired. Why is it that when you get next to no sleep, your body insists on waking early? Like c'mon! I don't have anywhere to be for like 3 more hours! Guh.
So here I sit in my jammies, listening to Radiohead's Okay Computer, paying off my bills and ignoring the cats.
Sounds fun wow exciting, I know.
And yes, my Saturday evening was wonderfully scandalous. In fact, it was so scandalous I missed the endings of both Trading Spaces episodes. Now I'll never know if that ugly couple liked the purple room Edward designed! In fact, I don't think I even saw the finished result.
That's right kids, I'm not going to dish on my evening (at least not now, need coffee first). But I will say a great evening/almost morning was had by all.
Thank you and good morning.
So here I sit in my jammies, listening to Radiohead's Okay Computer, paying off my bills and ignoring the cats.
Sounds fun wow exciting, I know.
And yes, my Saturday evening was wonderfully scandalous. In fact, it was so scandalous I missed the endings of both Trading Spaces episodes. Now I'll never know if that ugly couple liked the purple room Edward designed! In fact, I don't think I even saw the finished result.
That's right kids, I'm not going to dish on my evening (at least not now, need coffee first). But I will say a great evening/almost morning was had by all.
Thank you and good morning.
Friday, October 17, 2003
Thursday, October 16, 2003
Right. Watch this spot on Sunday for the update on my scandalous Saturday. Well, that is if it ends up being scandalous. What if it's just a quiet evening spent watching videos? Do you want to hear about that? I somehow doubt you horndogs would care about that.
And Chris, I want to be able to quit Weasel Central. I don't want them to turf me. That would suck arse. Quitting is much more fun than being fired. At least that's what I've learned. Though I've never been fired. Hmmmm.
One more random thought: when Daryl Hannah eventually dies, will she actually decompose or will future societies find her PERFECTLY PRESERVED BODY?!?!?!?!?
Ick.
And Chris, I want to be able to quit Weasel Central. I don't want them to turf me. That would suck arse. Quitting is much more fun than being fired. At least that's what I've learned. Though I've never been fired. Hmmmm.
One more random thought: when Daryl Hannah eventually dies, will she actually decompose or will future societies find her PERFECTLY PRESERVED BODY?!?!?!?!?
Ick.
Random Thursday Bits
My TMJ is acting up (of course it's my own damn fault, I'm too stubborn to use the mouth piece thingy at night).
I vowed to cut down on my alcohol consumption come November. Somehow even I knew I was lying about that. Cause, really, what the fuck else is there to do when it gets cold out?
My cold went away! Shmoopie, I think it was a hyper excited reaction to the notion of seeing you after MONTHS of not hanging out with you. Fo' sho'.
I'm still scared of Daryl Hannah and her boy boobies. And her roller skates.
So I have a "date" this weekend with the Weasel Central employee. Should be interesting, to say the least. No details to follow on that one, unless it's a complete bust and I end up having to quit my job from the shame of it all. Then I'll gladly reveal all. Cause that's how caring I am. Hott damn.
My TMJ is acting up (of course it's my own damn fault, I'm too stubborn to use the mouth piece thingy at night).
I vowed to cut down on my alcohol consumption come November. Somehow even I knew I was lying about that. Cause, really, what the fuck else is there to do when it gets cold out?
My cold went away! Shmoopie, I think it was a hyper excited reaction to the notion of seeing you after MONTHS of not hanging out with you. Fo' sho'.
I'm still scared of Daryl Hannah and her boy boobies. And her roller skates.
So I have a "date" this weekend with the Weasel Central employee. Should be interesting, to say the least. No details to follow on that one, unless it's a complete bust and I end up having to quit my job from the shame of it all. Then I'll gladly reveal all. Cause that's how caring I am. Hott damn.
Wednesday, October 15, 2003
Things I've learned today (after ingesting cold medication)
* when I get really stressed (especially after time away from Weasel Central), my body shuts down
* you don't have to see someone every day in order for them to be considered a really good friend (I love you Shmoopie!)
* I came down with a vicious cold in less than an hour.
* all the cold medication in my upstairs medicine cabinet is expired, leading me to think that this is the first cold of the year
* If I'm still sick by Saturday, I'll cry. Honestly.
* cats do not make very good squeeze toys
* Daryl Hannah is made up of at least 94% plastic (and 6% soft lighting)
* when I get really stressed (especially after time away from Weasel Central), my body shuts down
* you don't have to see someone every day in order for them to be considered a really good friend (I love you Shmoopie!)
* I came down with a vicious cold in less than an hour.
* all the cold medication in my upstairs medicine cabinet is expired, leading me to think that this is the first cold of the year
* If I'm still sick by Saturday, I'll cry. Honestly.
* cats do not make very good squeeze toys
* Daryl Hannah is made up of at least 94% plastic (and 6% soft lighting)
Monday, October 13, 2003
Saturday, October 11, 2003
Nothing says "successful end to a good, relaxing day" like making out in front of my yuppie scum building with part of Weasel Central's management team.
Who knew?
Sure as hell not me.
6 months of harbouring a crush on me.
5 minutes revealing it.
4 hours before we started acting on it.
And that my friends, is a good Saturday.
Who knew?
Sure as hell not me.
6 months of harbouring a crush on me.
5 minutes revealing it.
4 hours before we started acting on it.
And that my friends, is a good Saturday.
Friday, October 10, 2003
All I'm gonna say is you gotta go and see Kill Bill. Two hours of Uma Thurman kicking ass. Nuff said.
Thursday, October 09, 2003
This one's for Chris
Only cause I know she's itching for a new post.
All right. It's official: upper management thinks I'm really stupid. I'd go into details, but that would entail using Weasel Central speak. No one needs to hear that.
The easiest way to tell this story? It's like this, simple question, simple answer. Simple answer gets twisted by the minion who's giving it to someone else. Somehow this all gets back to the VP (who at the best of times makes it seem like she can't stomach me). She asks where the minion got the answer. All fingers point back to me. She automatically thinks I'm stupid. I'm then approached by my manager to "explain" a simple question. Question sounds familiar, I call manager on it, he explains that VP thinks I'm a moron. I suddenly think I need a new job.
Manager dude, you've been working next to me for YEARS.
Couldn't you just back me up instead of coming over and trying to be sly? Nope. That's not how things work here at Weasel Central. We must humiliate you. It's better than a bonus or a pat on the back.
Bad enough I work in the ghetto. But now the higher ups are wondering if I'm smart enough for this position. All this comes the day after I finally got a compliment out of them about what a good job I'm doing. That was the conversation where it slipped out (prior to the compliment) that they wouldn't post my current position (I'm filling in for my boss who's on sick leave) cause they were actually happy with me.
No wonder I fuckin' have ulcers and an impossible time sleeping.
*sigh*
Only cause I know she's itching for a new post.
All right. It's official: upper management thinks I'm really stupid. I'd go into details, but that would entail using Weasel Central speak. No one needs to hear that.
The easiest way to tell this story? It's like this, simple question, simple answer. Simple answer gets twisted by the minion who's giving it to someone else. Somehow this all gets back to the VP (who at the best of times makes it seem like she can't stomach me). She asks where the minion got the answer. All fingers point back to me. She automatically thinks I'm stupid. I'm then approached by my manager to "explain" a simple question. Question sounds familiar, I call manager on it, he explains that VP thinks I'm a moron. I suddenly think I need a new job.
Manager dude, you've been working next to me for YEARS.
Couldn't you just back me up instead of coming over and trying to be sly? Nope. That's not how things work here at Weasel Central. We must humiliate you. It's better than a bonus or a pat on the back.
Bad enough I work in the ghetto. But now the higher ups are wondering if I'm smart enough for this position. All this comes the day after I finally got a compliment out of them about what a good job I'm doing. That was the conversation where it slipped out (prior to the compliment) that they wouldn't post my current position (I'm filling in for my boss who's on sick leave) cause they were actually happy with me.
No wonder I fuckin' have ulcers and an impossible time sleeping.
*sigh*
Wednesday, October 08, 2003
Hey, this is gonna come as a surprise to y'all, but I'm BORED.
Something about this job. Hmmm, what could it be? Right. It's a soul sucking, fairly thankless, under paid position.
How could I forget that?
Other than that, it's all pretty good.
Well except for that fuckin' Arnie thing. That scares me more than the prospect of spending the rest of my life at Weasel Central. California, you shoulda gone for Gary Coleman.
Something about this job. Hmmm, what could it be? Right. It's a soul sucking, fairly thankless, under paid position.
How could I forget that?
Other than that, it's all pretty good.
Well except for that fuckin' Arnie thing. That scares me more than the prospect of spending the rest of my life at Weasel Central. California, you shoulda gone for Gary Coleman.
Tuesday, October 07, 2003
Boy am I glad to be back at Weasel Central today. I am currently so bored I'm thinking about setting myself on fire. Just for something different, really.
I forgot to tell y'all about this crazy assed "single's party" I went to on Saturday. It was called Playing with Matches and it was as gaybo as it sounds. People paid $125 (but not me and my friend, we got FREE tickets!). Then it got stupid. The cougars were beyond drunk, the guys with the comb overs were going after the barely legals (girls, how did you manage the cover charge?) and I was horrified at the whole display. Guys milling about, too scared to talk to any of the ladies who were standing around looking single and desperate. Dude, if I dropped that kind of stupid cash, I'd be talking to EVERYONE. Mind you, I was kinda drunk by the end of the night, so I was talking to EVERYONE. Buah ha ha. We did the speed dating thing, and I got yelled at by this little psycho redhead guy for not having an ID number (uh, I've already explained, I didn't register for this and see that gal with the headset? Yeah? She pulled me in here to talk to you. So shut up. What? The 3 minutes is over? Dang.).
All I can say is thank gawd for free drink tickets. And power drinking on an empty stomach. That makes everything more fun.
More details to follow. Like, did I get picked by any of those crazy speed date guys? Hmmm. I wonder.
I forgot to tell y'all about this crazy assed "single's party" I went to on Saturday. It was called Playing with Matches and it was as gaybo as it sounds. People paid $125 (but not me and my friend, we got FREE tickets!). Then it got stupid. The cougars were beyond drunk, the guys with the comb overs were going after the barely legals (girls, how did you manage the cover charge?) and I was horrified at the whole display. Guys milling about, too scared to talk to any of the ladies who were standing around looking single and desperate. Dude, if I dropped that kind of stupid cash, I'd be talking to EVERYONE. Mind you, I was kinda drunk by the end of the night, so I was talking to EVERYONE. Buah ha ha. We did the speed dating thing, and I got yelled at by this little psycho redhead guy for not having an ID number (uh, I've already explained, I didn't register for this and see that gal with the headset? Yeah? She pulled me in here to talk to you. So shut up. What? The 3 minutes is over? Dang.).
All I can say is thank gawd for free drink tickets. And power drinking on an empty stomach. That makes everything more fun.
More details to follow. Like, did I get picked by any of those crazy speed date guys? Hmmm. I wonder.
Monday, October 06, 2003
So I've been kinda quiet the last week. That's cause I've been spending most of my free time playing cards with my Gram. Oh, and watching Columbo and The Price is Right.
Wooo.
I've got a "sick" day (thank you formerly uncaring manager for suggesting it) today. I'm gonna chill out with my wee beasties, get kinda dressed (I think I'm gonna rock these pimpin' pj pants) and go see my Gram. And watch The Price is Right. I hate The Price is Right. I hate Bob Barker. But I love watching my Gram watch that drivel.
There you have it. The last few days of my life.
That and SquawkBox sucks my left tit. For real.
Welcome HaloScan. Well, until they piss me off and I switch to someone else.
Booyakka.
Wooo.
I've got a "sick" day (thank you formerly uncaring manager for suggesting it) today. I'm gonna chill out with my wee beasties, get kinda dressed (I think I'm gonna rock these pimpin' pj pants) and go see my Gram. And watch The Price is Right. I hate The Price is Right. I hate Bob Barker. But I love watching my Gram watch that drivel.
There you have it. The last few days of my life.
That and SquawkBox sucks my left tit. For real.
Welcome HaloScan. Well, until they piss me off and I switch to someone else.
Booyakka.
Wednesday, October 01, 2003
8 Hours of sleep over 2 days, 1 hour of Price is Right, 2 insane cats and 1 functioning Gram.
Right now that's my idea of heaven. Especially last night's Price is Right. The grand winner? A total frat boy who was a mouth breather. My Gram couldn't figure out why that shit was cracking me up. Actually, I'm not sure why I found it to be that funny. Maybe it was the sleep deprivation.
Tonight I'm gonna sleep like I've never slept before. Awww yeah. I figure it's safe to stay at my place tonight after spending last night with Gram. It's odd to sleep elsewhere. Mum made me take her bed last night and we confused the fuck out of my grandmother. Nice eh? The woman has a stroke and we decide to play musical bedrooms. Welcome to my family. We're mean even when we're trying to be nice!
I think I'm gonna wrestle with my cats when I get home.
Maybe this time they'll let me win.
Right now that's my idea of heaven. Especially last night's Price is Right. The grand winner? A total frat boy who was a mouth breather. My Gram couldn't figure out why that shit was cracking me up. Actually, I'm not sure why I found it to be that funny. Maybe it was the sleep deprivation.
Tonight I'm gonna sleep like I've never slept before. Awww yeah. I figure it's safe to stay at my place tonight after spending last night with Gram. It's odd to sleep elsewhere. Mum made me take her bed last night and we confused the fuck out of my grandmother. Nice eh? The woman has a stroke and we decide to play musical bedrooms. Welcome to my family. We're mean even when we're trying to be nice!
I think I'm gonna wrestle with my cats when I get home.
Maybe this time they'll let me win.